The Wart

Over the years we all change. Our entire life is composed of a slow metamorphosis. Our bodies, our minds grow. We become stronger, more aware and hopefully smarter.

We fight a constant battle with metamorphosis to control the look of our bodies and constant battle with our minds hoping that someday they will morph into something useful.

Joe's metamorphosis was not a life long change from young to old. Oh yes, that did happen to Joe as it happens to all of us. His was a different metamorphosis. His metamorphosis was like that of an insect.

At first it was slow, unnoticeable, unless you count the wart on the side of his nose. But who would thank that a wart was the beginning of something hideous. Yes, it was in a bad spot. No one would want  a wart on the side of their nose, especially one that continued to grow.

At first he tried what he liked to call "Wart be Gone". It was was stuff he bought at the local drug store. When the wart continued to grow he went to the old lady on Elm Street that was locally famous for removing warts with with what Joe called "Mumbo-Jumbo".

She had removed a particularly large one from his foot a few years earlier. The process was a simple one. She would cut an onion in half, rub the wart with both halves of the onion and then bury the onion making real sure that it was "buried upside down". The she would do the "Mumbo-Jumbo" on the wart, commanding it to go away.

Joe's foot wart went away and so did everyone else's warts who would demean themselves long enough to go through the ceremony. Some thought of the old lady as witch. Other's said she was crazy, but no one ever said the "onion treatment" didn't work. It was like an underground drug operation. No one ever admitted that they had "wart treatment" form Mrs. Neumanzel but they were all willing to say, "I've herd that Mrs. Neumanzel can get rid of warts".

Joe's nose wart didn't go away. It just got bigger and painful. It began to bleed and Joe began wearing a hood in an attempt to cover his problem. He returned to Mrs Neumanzel for her advice.

She studied the wart and decided on a more exotic treatment. She made a poultice of onions and horseradish and her "special herbs" and applied the mixture to Joe's wart which by them covered the whole side of his face and was beginning to move into his heck.

She gave Joe the remainder and told him to apply it twice a day and what ever he did not to wash it off. The wart grew bigger. It moved onto his throat and then covered his chest. He did not return to Mrs. Neumanzel.

He finally opted for the local doctor who chided him for neglecting the wart for so long. He was afraid to tell her about Mrs. Neumanzel. The doctor froze the wart with liquid nitrogen. The wart doubled in size in one day. It then covered his full face, chest, back and buttocks.

He could no longer sit without making the wart bleed and when it bled it fed on the blood and grew bigger. He was referred to a specialist who chided the referral doctor for not realizing the wart was cancerous and began an immediate treatment of radiation. The wart continued to grow. They quarantined Joe and would not allow anyone to visit him.

He was in constant pain so they filled him with morphine. The morphine also fed the wart which then covered Joe's entire body. Joe was no longer discernible as a human being. The wart had choked off his vocal chord and he could no longer speak. His only means of communication was the constant moaning. When the nurses went into check the monitoring equipment they were dressed to avoid any contact with the wart.

One doctor suggested that they just overdose him with the morphine. But, doctors were not allowed to practice euthanasia. The wart grew. They continued to monitor it and feed it with radiation and morphine.

A local farmer went to see Mrs. Neumanzel to remove a wart. He found her lying in her onion patch covered with what seemed to him as one big wart. He called the police and then went to the local doctor.

She said, "I have a wart like that. In fact I just treated it with liquid nitrogen. Come on in and I'll get rid of it for you.

gs batty
written for "mindlovemisery"...Metamorphosis...