the phone rings

It was a wrong number that started it, the telephone ringing three times in the dead of night.  Unfortunately the person that answers those rings has no way of knowing that it is a wrong number.  The phone woke Tom and Dana up.  Who could that be at this time of night?  Tom rolled over and mumbled hello.  No one responded.  Hello he said, who is this?  Still no answer and then the click of the other party hanging up.  Who was it, Dana asked?  I don't know, they hung up.  Wrong number I guess.  They both rolled over and tried to go back to sleep, but Tom couldn't.  He wasn't supposed to be home that night.  He had come home from his run  a day early.  His normal run put  him in Phoenix on Wednesday and Thursday nights.

This week one of the accounts didn't have any freight so he deadheaded home early.  He was wide awake.  Recently he had been wondering if she had been cheating on him.

 She could cheat so easy with him gone two nights each week.  Was that her boy friend calling?  The bug had been planted and it grew and festered the rest of the night.  He got up early and got himself a beer.  By the time Dana got up he was drunk and mad.  He knew she had been cheating on him.  He accused her.  He wouldn't believe her.  Who was he?  How long?  Then he hit her with a back hand that split her lip and sent her sprawling.  He heard a noise behind him and turned.  The bullet entered his chest, exploded his heart and tore a hole in his back the size of a fist.  He was dead before his body hit the floor.  God Dana said, what are you doing here?  The killer replied, I knew he was suspicious when he answered the phone.  I came to see if you were all right. This is perfect he said.  You  can say you killed him and claim self defense.  He helped her off the floor and kissed her.  My brother wasn't worth a damn he said,  He's better off dead.


carry on tuesdays

20 comments:

  1. You big softy youa love story and told so well......aww hugs and cuddles Grizz...... Now can we have a beer or what?

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  2. High murder drama when its kept in the family! Fast paced!

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  3. thanks mr whitesnake..the beer is on me when and if I ever get to the fine country of yours.

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  4. Greyscale Territory....have I ever said how much I like that name. absolutely awesome. thanks for the comment. a good portion of murders have something to do with family and passion

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  5. I like the pace!

    knife's edge

    Please don't forget to post your creative works at Monday Poetry Train Revisited too!

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  6. True love - My favorite! Nice job. :)

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  7. Damn, but you're good. Here I am thinking he's all paranoid and doesn't he know a good woman when he sees one? BAM.

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  8. gautami - thank you, I have been working on my pace. I have a problem with too many commas and too many compound sentences. your comment makes me think I am moving forward.

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  9. Serena - true love in todays world

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  10. Weronika - thank you. I'm keeping all your comments to have you sign when you are famous

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  11. patois - appreciate that. Love the compliment

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  12. Now that's what I call keeping it in the family. Gritty. Good stuff!

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  13. A family affair...love it.
    See you at the airport (wake me up)...I'll be the one with a pair of...

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  14. Selma -thanks a little twist on all in the family

    Stan - pink or blue

    Missy thanks probably a lot I think i get my ideas from forensic files a lot of murder going on out there.

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  15. Fast paced, gritty and a great twist at the end. Excellent.

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  16. Great story. I love the twist at the end. I definitely didn't see it coming. I was thinking she's completely innocent and he's just being paranoid and BAM!

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  17. Families! Great story, great pace, great twist. I loved it!

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  18. Good one Grizz - I was surprised! Now write the next part, where she pins it all on the brother and walks away with the life insurance money :)

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